The Wright Family
Often times we are asked why we decided to adopt. While this question presents the opportunity to discuss our lives and faith in great detail, we typically respond quite simply by saying “we were called to.”
Following the birth of our second daughter, we were advised that any future pregnancies would put both the mother and unborn child at severe risk. Both pregnancies were incredibly difficult on my wife, and rapid weight loss due to relentless nausea placed both her and our unborn daughters in danger. This was not the plan we had for our family. Our family was supposed to be large and full of unique personalities. While my two daughter’s worked increasingly hard through their daily exuberance to fill any perceived “personality void,” we both knew that we had a desire for additional children. One Sunday afternoon in the spring of 2010, while attending church, our pastor preached a sermon based on James 1:27. This powerful verse refers to the need of caring for widows and orphans in their distress. God’s words spoke clearly to us that day. As we later reflected on this message, we began the conversation of adoption.
While my wife had always loved the idea of adopting, I was at best, warm to the idea. It wasn’t as though I couldn’t recognize the beauty of such an act, but rather I struggled with personal insecurities as it related to my ability to love that child as much as one born to our family. This was a concern rooted in ignorance, and consistently shielded by financial constraints. I never had to fully process the thought of adoption, because we simply couldn’t afford it. To further complicate this idea, we had just decided that my wife would resign from her position at Pittsburgh Public Schools in order to devote her time to being a stay-at-home mother. Finances were already slightly unsettled with two children and one income, which made the prospect of another significant expense seem unfeasible. However, common sense sometimes gives way to a calling, and as my wife worked diligently towards me removing the shield. Through much prayer and contemplation, I began to lower my guard and gradually embrace the idea.
A few months later we began the process of qualifying for our first adoption. And on June 25th we received a call around 6:30pm asking if we could be in Dearborn, Michigan by 10:00am. “Yes” my wife screamed nervously! She then began to run around the house doing what could only be described as “nesting.” She frantically paced around in search of a calmness that didn’t exist, all the while yelling at me for not being stressed enough. Apparently my high anxiety levels result in me entering a coma-like state. It was a comical scene that I remember fondly. At 4:00am our alarms went off and we jumped in our car with a mission to accomplish. After meeting with our attorneys, we arrived at the hospital just outside of Detroit, Michigan. The feeling of waiting to meet your new child in this manner cannot be explained. The euphoric joy accompanied by a debilitating fear of the unknown keeps man prayerfully seeking guidance. As we entered the neonatal intensive care unit, we met our son. After a few hours with our son, the attending doctor told us that he no longer needed to be in the intensive care unit. He assured us that our presence and touch alone was enough to raise his weakened heart rate and deepen his labored breathing. We fell in love instantly.
Six months later we were back in the process, determined to adopt a young baby brother to our 3 children. While some questioned our sanity, those closest to our family recognized our calling and rallied around us. Through some creative budgeting and some loving and generous friends, we were able to adopt our second son just shy of 11 months after our first son was born. Amazed by this second incredible blessing, we embraced another baby boy. Our daughters, now young caregivers, swarmed their baby brothers constantly checking for burps or any signs of discomfort. After two weeks in Phoenix, Arizona we arrived back home safely. This was the large family we had always dreamed of! The many blessings also came with hardship. In order to help finance the cost of multiple adoptions, it was necessary for my wife to return to full-time work.
And just as we thought our adventures had concluded, we received a call in the fall of 2013 asking us to consider a third adoption. Our immediate reaction was quite predictable. It was impossible. We had depleted all of our resources and incurred significant debt from the previous adoptions. With two working parents and four children, we could not seriously consider another adoption. A few weeks later, we were still struggling with a silent uneasiness, until we listened to a sermon about discerning the difference between your personal desires in comparison to your calling. That is when the pastor pronounced that, “when God asks something of you, He does not ask that you be qualified, He only ask that you be willing”. It was at that very moment, that we knew our fifth child would soon be born.
With an intimate understanding of the financial strains that arise throughout the process of adoption, we are proud to support the efforts of Gregory’s Gift. Their mission provides much needed assistance to adoptive parents on their journey to grow their family.
Applying for Adoption Assistance @ Gregory's Gift
if your interested in applying for funding through Gregory's Gift, or know someone who would be, please download and complete our Adoption Assistance application. Once completed, send the completed application and supporting materials to the address provided by Lifesong for Orphans (found on the application).